Comic review: Weirdworld #1- A Flabby Voice of Surrender.

Artist: Mike Del Mundo
Writer: Jason Aaron
Colours: Mike Del Mundo & Marco D’Alfonso
Publisher: Marvel (Disney)
Released: 10th June 2015


I didn’t find this ‘WeirdWorld’ to be particularly weird. The art portrayed weird, if weird is psychedelic trippy hippie 1960’s weird, but the narrative itself was just another mainstream comic book story of a lost Conan clone trying to get home, and fighting monsters.

I don’t think that it’s unfair to call Arkon (the protagonist in this book) a ‘Conan clone’ because, well, just look at him. He’s Conan, and it would be daft to pretend that he’s not. I read a lot of Conan books, and there’s no mistaking it. This guy is as close to being Conan as you can possibly get, at least visually speaking anyway.

Jason Aaron writes Arkon as a generic, indistinguishable 2015 era comic book protagonist. The narrative unfolds with Arkon as narrator, telling his own story as he waves his chopper at sharks and jumps off waterfalls. The actions are blood and guts toughness, but the voice of Arkon, unfortunately, is not in the least bit Conan. In place of the iron willed barbarian voice of defiance, courage and brutal integrity we get wet, limp and border line comedic.

‘How does one eviscerate despair? How do you strangle hopelessness?’

What a wuss. Is this Conan the Emo? I don’t think that it’s supposed to be. No, it’s just another limp comic book character written during very dire times for western masculinity. As I read this comic book, enjoying the beautifully painted artwork and lovingly crafted panels, I’m becoming painfully aware that this barbarian, this man of muscles and swords, isn’t really any different to any other whining ‘hero’ that I would read in a mainstream comic book of today.

Five pages in and he’s crying like a child lost in a supermarket. On page seven he is already done. A victim of despair, he’s ready to kill himself, not because of any great problem, not because he’s injured and about to be torn apart by a pack of dogs and unable to defend himself, but because he’s lost, and can’t be bothered to keep on trying to fight. I’m not joking. Seven pages in and this child-man is looking to jump off the nearest cliff. Now that’s a modern emo barbarian hero for you. Why continue to fight to the end when you can moan like a little girl and then do yourself in?

Before our hero takes the final leap into self indulgence, he’s forced into another fight, and the narrative goes into the usual ‘cool’ mode of story-telling that is so common in books (and movies) of today. You know how it goes, right?

Do you have nothing to say? Do you spend your entire life in a fantasy world where reality never peeks, thus making you incapable of saying anything about the world or what it means to have real human experiences? No problem, do something ‘cool’ instead. ‘Cool’ is God now, the comic book geeks live for ‘cool,’ so give it to them until they drown in the stuff.

The cool continues in Weirdworld #1 until the end of the book where the narrative POV switches to a sexy villainous, a girl for Conan the Emo Barbarian to have adventures with. Who knows? If he’s lucky he might even get a small peck on the cheek from her? No girl with anything at all going for her would want to give this drip a proper kiss, so friend-zone is the best that somebody like Arkon the weak could ever hope for.

Poor old Jason Aaron. He’s trying to write tough, and all he’s doing is writing another limp-wristed death of masculinity contemporary ‘hero.’

The artwork by Mike Del Mundo is great. I loved his swirls, his colours, and his artistic theme of harsh bloody, dirty reality mixing with the golden shine of magical fantasy. Mike Del Mundo is a new name to me, and I’ll be keeping an eye on him, but the writing, Aaron’s version of masculinity in particular, is embarrassing. There’s a sense of passive aggressive wetness about it all, and the supposition heavy, narrative voice of the protagonist reads about as well as the awfully stilted dialogue in a Stephen King novel.

It’s a shame. I loved the art, but the voice of the hero, the voice of everybody in the book actually, was just too much wet for me to take.

I really tried to like the book. It’s swords and sorcery, and I love swords and sorcery. It’s Conan (it is) and I love Conan, but it’s an old genre with a modern voice.

That modern voice is completely unbearable. It feels soft, bloated, unused to difficulty and unwilling or unable to endure empty days of useless toil for zero award. There was a feeling of entitlement to it, of expecting that life will be easy, that it will have meaning, that there will be rewards, when anybody who has actually lived a life knows that existence is usually just routine, pain, indifference, frustration, nothingness and toil, toil, toil.

I couldn’t help but take a dislike to the flabby tone of the book, and as much as I loved the artwork, that narrative voice of surrender ultimately stopped me from having the fun that I was desperately trying to have.


Rating: 5/10 (For the art alone)